Clare Bronfman

Me

Responsibility does not only lie with the leaders of our countries or with those who have been appointed or elected to do a particular job. It lies with each of us individually. Peace, for example, starts within each one of us. When we have inner peace, we can be at peace with those around us.

– His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama

For almost nine years I lived like a Gypsy, traveling the world with a small community of people. As a professional show-jumper (equestrian), I had the good fortune to represent the United States many times with my teammates. Together we would travel from country to country to compete, sharing wonderful experiences along the way. We came to rely on each other for success, advice and the sharing of resources. During the course of competition, we succeeded together and failed together; however, the sense of “together” always ended there. At the end of the day, we would go our separate ways—often I wouldn’t even recognize riders if they weren’t wearing their riding attire.

Just over four years ago, I made a decision that drastically changed the course of my life: I retired from the sport of show jumping. I distinctly remember the choice: after the first EM Tech Training™ I was doing drills and practicing my newly learned skills; I had worked with four people and was on my way to the fifth. As I was driving in my car that day, I felt more fulfilled than I had after the most successful victory of my riding career—I realized I had earned the privilege of connecting deeply with other humans, and was able to help change their lives profoundly. In that moment I decided it was time to join a new community.

As I write this, VWeek 2009 is coming to an end. What has been so remarkable to me over the past ten days is our community: we are a group of people from all different walks of life—different cultures, careers, ages—who have come together not because of a common profession or a common activity, but because of a common ideology. We’ve created our community because of a common way we want to be in the world, with each other and with ourselves.

For me, the beauty of our community is how we support one another. We come together based on a mutual value of evolving into a more noble humanity, and through our willingness to show up for ourselves and one another, and utilizing the remarkable tools of Rational Inquiry™, we’re able to help each other blossom.

As I walked out of my room this morning, I encountered a person I have only known for a few days and I experienced a feeling of love. Never in my life did I think I would be able to look at people I barely know and feel a deep sense of love.

This week I’ve pushed through fears to uphold myself, and as I watched others push through their fears, I felt profoundly moved by the beauty of the human spirit; I was in awe of the human struggle. I never thought I would be able to experience such compassion.

I believe the greatest gift one human can give to another is the gift of humanity—the opportunity to see oneself and others as human. What Keith Raniere brings to the world is such a gift.

I remember sitting in the girls locker room before gym class – I could hear the playful boisterous voices of my classmates down the hall – however I was alone. I was 12 years old, and the only girl in my class at school. I wanted so badly to be like the boys – to be accepted by them to be allowed to play with them - I tried to rid myself of all “girly” qualities and blend in.

Two days ago three of my friends, two men and a woman, were discussing different “games” we could share with a larger group of our friends to help alleviate fear and develop trust in our community. There were certain things we could not all agree upon – and I was perplexed as to why! I easily slip back to my childhood where I forget to notice just how different we are from each other, neither good nor bad, just different. For the past two years, I have been a part of a women’s organization – Jness - which imparts a curricula developed to help women distinguish the differences between men and women, understand the differences and embrace them. Through this education I am learning about the essence of a woman in me and the beauty of vulnerability, and the true strength we have within us.

In history women have stood together to bring about change peacefully, to stop violence through non-violence, yet here at home, we are often blind to it. Here it is a subtle violence, one we all participate in: We destroy our own essence, by trying to blend in, by judging our differences, by believing the modern day image of a woman is who we are or should be – through this we destroy the essence of both man and woman.

Women have a special capacity to lead us to a more peaceful world with compassion, affection and kindness. And there is no more important time for that than this moment.

- His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Photography by Michael Eldredge

His Holiness the Dalai Lama’s visit has come and gone, and I believe left a distinct impression on those of us directly involved in his visit, those who came to, or saw, his public talk, our entire community and I believe the world. For me he leaves an impression of nobility. His leadership is exemplary; his firm commitment to uphold the values he deeply expresses despite adversity is such an inspiration to me. His ability to balance being firm, direct, compassionate, humorous and humble is remarkable – something I hope to learn from and grow with in myself.

Due to the on going struggle several of my closest friends and I have here in Albany - how we have been portrayed in the media – his visiting and message was particularly moving. His coming brought about a certain contradiction: what is written about NXIVM, Keith, Sara and myself in the press – being labeled as a cult – and a world leader showing his support for us after thorough investigation.

How do you resolve such a contradiction?